Sweet Tooth

Okay, So I have a tiny bit of a "sweets" addiction. Just a small one.....Right. It's enormous! Giganticly Gigantic! But here's the thing. If I go without candies, cakes, cookies etc for a longer period of time (for me a long period of time is about 3 days) then I'm totally fine & can resist the temptation to devour an entire bag of Sour Patch Kids. But once I get that one taste, I'm like a crack-addict wanting her next fix. That's all I can think about is....mmm....I wonder what kind of sweet-treat I can have after lunch. I'm somewhat OKAY about resisting these urges. Somewhat. Today I was not. I brought an apple & an orange with me to work to see if I could trick myself. Didn't work. You can't fool a candy addict. After I ate my lunch (I'm addicted to the Tuna Salad at Literati Cafe. D-Licious) I convinced myself that, "Hey, it's okay to have a small bit of sweets today. The market by the office has really great chocolate chip cookies. I'll just eat half & then save the rest for tomorrow." It's conversations like this that I have with myself that get my pants a fittin-snugly. Well, I stopped into the market and instead of getting the cookie (which I really don't even like chocolate chip cookies much) I noticed their fine expansive array of protein bars. I don't like protein bars. I think they taste like ass. But some of the names of these bars were intriguing. I started to think..."hey, the Peanut Butter Caramel bar sounds like it would satiate my sweet-tooth & it's a healthier option." So I went for it. I bypassed my cookie & went for the "Think Think Pink: Peanut Butter Caramel bar". If I wanted to taste chalky cardboard I would've....well, I probably never have wanted to taste chalky cardboard & I now know for sure that I will NEVER want to taste anything that resembles this "protein bar"/Chalk brick. One bite and I knew. Shoulda gone for the cookie. But now I am in a pickle. Do I go back into the market & get the cookie? They would of course know that I was defeated by my brain's "oh I'm going to be healthy attitude" and give in to the cookie. I didn't do that. I was even worse. I stopped off at the bagel shop "to get some hot tea" well knowing they serve donuts. I don't even like donuts that much! But my "stomach" was on a sweetness mission & my brain was not doing a very good job in coersing me out of it. So I wait in line at the bagel shop. A long line. It's signs like these that I should pay attention to. I wanted something sweet. I got a chalk bar. There's a huge line at my next stop. Two people cut in front of me because I was probably in a slobbery daze in front of the donut window. I have to ask/tell the woman 3 times which donut I want because she doesn't understand that I want the "old-fashioned glazed donut" not the bland, drab un-glazed one. Yah, nothing stopped me. And you know what....I ate that freakin donut in like two seconds. I don't even remember eating it. Well, that's actually an exaggeration. It took me about 5 minutes but my point is, I didn't really need or want the donut. I wanted it but looking back I definitely could've just done without it. So now I kinda feel guilty but not really. It's more comical than anything. I cannot even talk myself out of eating something sweet after lunch. I went TWO years without eating candy. TWO YEARS. That's a very very very long time for someone who calls themselves a candy addict. And you know what....after the first month of not eating candy I didn't even miss it. I could prance back and forth along the candy isle & not twitch a muscle. (A month may seem like a long time to not eat candy but for me it was 4 agonizing weeks). But then I got over it. So....with all of this being said I believe I would like to stop eating candy again. I can't say for how long. But honestly, this current sweets/candy obsession has GOT TO GO. I do fancy myself some Cadbury Eggs so perhaps I can swing it till Easter. We'll see. For now I'll just be on my super sugar high for the next hour & then Crash, Boom, Bang, down I go.