A letter to a friend…..
I can see why you have a connection with English Steven. He is witty & charming but he lives in England. Drab. He cleverly writes his e-mail with proper punctuation (a BIG plus in my book…well I don’t really have a book but you get the idea). Please tell me the sunglasses I was wearing yesterday are not the same as the ‘genital face/cock nose’ pair he spoke about in his e-mail. I am forever frightened if so. His proposition of a six month stint would be phenomenally fun! I don’t think you should nix the idea just yet. And anywho….you do live on the left hand side of the country and are in close proximity to many roads so let’s cross your blistered fingers & hope he comes to visit you soon. In the meantime just keep mesmerizing Superman into falling in love with you & your IQ of 160. Did you say you have not seen Iron Man? Scott was correct last night in saying you resemble ‘Pepper’ – the assistant to comic book character science guru turned into world saving hero. You are my partner in crime/fun/scandalous activity. Was there any scandalous activity last night? Oh wait yes there was…..you dancing with the quasi homeless man in the poncho made from my grandmothers rug while I was getting down with the didgeridoo. And then he wanted your number!! With what phone? You’d have to communicate with a cup and string! Ha ha ha, that was divine to witness such a momentous occasion. You made his year! If Ed was not completely frightened by our fun ways we will still have our slightly cracked/glued together skull heads. Speaking of which….did we leave those in Scott’s car? I truly hope so. Again my sincerest apologies for tossing your skull head into his car. I had not anticipated the bounce factor of the skull hitting the seat to be so high. I will stay true to my word…if you would like to exchange skull heads I am happy to oblige to your request. When are we going to make our hula hoops? Let’s put that on the to-do list ASAP because next time we go mash-up dancing at BootieLA I wanna be prepared to kick ass (or at least swivel it around). Wasn’t the hula-girls name Ruby? She’s your hula-hooping soul mate. What colors would you choose to decorate with? Would I go bright 80’s neon, disco glam glittery or dark, sultry Indian/Hindi style? Decisions decisions. I burnt my fingers a few times whilst making our delicious quesadilla. (I hope that when you read that last sentence you pronounced it Dilla like Villa not Dilla like Seeya). Next time I’m over at the Hill Street Pad, Apt. F I will replace the deliciously pink & white animals covered in nonpareils that I ravaged last night. I was just thinking….how the heck did you get your hands so blistered last night?? I thought I was drumming it pretty hard last night but in comparison to the outcome of your brutally blistered fingers/palms I guess I’m mistaken. OMG- I cannot believe those 18 year old girls tried getting you to buy them a drink yesterday. I bet it was an undercover sting operation! Good thing you have high moral standards, I wonder how many years in jail you would’ve had to spend. ;0) Ha ha, I kid I kid. It’s 81 freaking degrees right now & the office is the last place I’d like to be about now. When did we text Juli? I must have been totally committed to my Disarrono & couldn’t pay attention. It was a blast seeing Alina…I questioned myself about asking her about my missing wigs….but seeing that she borrowed them 4 years ago I surmised that she probably threw them out or she secretly wears them nightly & is so attached to them she couldn’t bare losing them. DO NOT DELETE the message we left ourselves. Was it when I was calling you to hear my spastic ring tone? We sure traveled the town last night. Scott once called me a tornado & I can proudly call you a tornado as well. Because we whip right in, stir things up, hop from here to there….we may cause a lot of ruckus but in the end….wait….tornados don’t really end well for the others. It is fun for us though so oh well. There were a few texts that I received from T-Dog this morning & as the hungover banter ensued, I was asking about the BBQ, etc….he said something about burgers & smores & I wrote back….”Smores? I’m so jealous!” Then he wrote back and said, “you said the same thing last night when I said we were making smores”. Ha ha, I then went back and checked my texting log last night & sure’nuf I had written…. “Smores? I love smores! I’m so jealous”. Didn’t really remember that. Oops. Perhaps the Jameson snuck up on me too. BTW those were some dang good nachos last night. I think I said the joke “What do you call cheese that’s not yours?” a few too many times last night. Especially to Ed who kindly laughed each time I told the joke although he was probably more annoyed than anything. Oh, and I made him take one of the skulls and ask in a funny voice if the guy across from us wanted a beer. All I wanted was for the guy to crack a smile. He seemed so serious and intent on not having fun. But then again, his fun may not be our fun & vice versa ya know? Good times. Yes. Tornado’s indeed. Are you up for dinner with Sevada & Caitlin & crew? I’m not sure yet as a nap is definitely in my near future once I manage Sawtelle traffic through mini-Japan town & hook a left onto Olympic to get home. (Just in case you wanted a play by play mapquest-y imagery of my decent into traffic hell after work). Oh and guess who still had her banana flavored lip gloss and gingerlilly positivity spray stuck in her bra which she just found moments ago?? That’s right! Kristen Paige Terry. That’s one classy lady. It’s super hilarious as to what I can stuff in my bra & then completely forget about. The benefits of being small chested. Well I best be gettin back to work seeing that I am being paid to deliriously write to you on Facebook. Up up and away!!
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